A   G D A   G D
A   G D A   G D
A   G D A   G D
A   G D A   G D

[Verse 1]
             A     G          D            A     G D
I want a new duck,   one that won't try to bite,
A                       G          D      A                G         D      A D D
  One that won't chew a hole in my socks,   one that won't quack all night.
             D     C          G          D     C G
I want a new duck,   one with big webbed feet,
D                       C       G   A                   G      D       A G D
  One that knows how to wash my car   and keep his room   real   neat.
E              E7       E6       E           E7      E6
One that won't raid the ice box, one that'll stay in shape,
C                F            C            D
One that's never gonna try to migrate or escape,
         N.C.
Or I'll tie him up with duck tape.

[Interlude]
A   G D A   G D
A   G D A   G D

[Verse 2]
             A     G   D         A        G D
I want a new duck,   a mallard I   think,
A                       G          D     A                        G        D       A D D
  One that won't make a mess of my house   or build a nest in the bathroom   sink.
             D     C          G              D     C G
I want a new duck,   one that won't steal my beer,
D                          C          G     A                    G          D       A G D
  One that won't stick his bill in my mail,   one that knows the duck stops   here.
E              E7       E6    E        E7  E6
One that won't drive me crazy waddling all around,
C                   F               C              D
One who'll teach me how to swim and help me not to drown,
    N.C.        A G D      A       G D            A       G D   A G D
And show me how     to get   down,     how to get   down, baby.     Get it?

[Chorus]
A               G             D        A G D
  Quack, quack, quack, quack,   quack,
A               G             D
  Quack, quack, quack, quack,   quack,
A                      G               D
  Quack, quack, quack,   quack, quack,   quack, quack,
A G D A G               D
          Quack, quack,   quack, quack,
A G D A                      G             D
        Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.

[Verse 3]
             A     G       D         A      G D
I want a new duck,   not a swan or a goose,
A                    G          D     A                 G        D      A D D
  Just a drake I can dress real cute,   think I'm gonna name him Bruce.
             D     C       G           D    C G
I want a new duck,   not a quail or an owl,
D                C        G     A                G         D       A G D
  One that won't molt too much,   one that won't smell too   fowl.
E              E7      E6           E        E7        E6
One that won't beg for breadcrumbs, hangin' around all day,
     C               F               C              D
He'd better mind his manners, better do just what I say,
        N.C.     A G D      A   G D      A   G      D      A G D
Or he's gonna be     duck pâté,   duck pâté,   yah,   yah.

[Chorus]
A               G             D        A G D
  Quack, quack, quack, quack,   quack,
A               G             D
  Quack, quack, quack, quack,   quack,
A                      G               D
  Quack, quack, quack,   quack, quack,   quack, quack,
A G D A G               D
          Quack, quack,   quack, quack,
A G D A                      G             D
        Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.